New year resolution - Listening to others & commanding/requesting others.
Till yesterday I was thinking that, if we were suggesting some cool ideas in Office or some good decisions to my friends/relatives - They should listen and execute my advice/command.
But today, when i was in bed at early morning i had a thought of taking new year resolution for '09. Thats where my thought process excelled and made me to think about the past 27years of my life. I used to make new-year-resolution mostly every year, here goes the examples - 'Should do my home work in time', 'Should return home early in the evening', 'Should not say any lies to my Amma, Appa or Anna', 'Should be more truthful to my anna and amma', 'Should score very high marks', 'Should not follow or think about any pretty Gals', 'Should continue my prayers of reading Kantha-Sasthi-Kavasam and writing SriRamaJeyam', even i had taken pledge like should write dairy every day. But at last alas every thing went in vain. Nothing happened as i expected.
Thinking continued and ended up in the un-answerable-question - "How many times my own brain is not ready to execute my commands/advice(mostly desires)". (When i planned for going to gym or swimming regularly - My brain will come up with hell lot of excuses to skip each and every day. I find myself very creative in finding cool reasons as excuses. )
Which helped to me come out of all my illusions about the real world thats where i am bundled with.
Then how come i can expect others such as my friends, relatives, colleagues or my family members can to listen and execute my commands/advice at-once. Then I just started thinking about my day-to-day life. I used to command my mom to do so many things as i like, with out knowing that it will be very hard for a women aged over 55 years to change her characters. Even i used to advice/command my colleagues in office, with out knowing that they are fresh out of college, they need some time to get adopted to the corporate world. I used to list out positives and negatives to my friends when i ever i came up with my own idea - which i expect them to follow. How many times i would have scolded my loved one for not executing my commands.
So finally coming to the conclusion - how should I end this blog. Gonna take a new year resolution saying "Dont expect others to execute/follow your advice/commands at-once. Give them some sweet time, they will definitely realize if my advices were helpful to them. Else let the TIME give them the lesson, if they do any mistakes." - Still gonna give out advices/commands with out expecting a change.
EXPECTATION IS THE MOTHER OF DISAPPOINTMENTS :)
I will come back here soon to post more on precedence in-line with my new year pledge. Hope this is the hardest resolution that i had ever taken. I know it is close-to-impossible to execute this 100% - but lemme try !!
Happy and Prosperous New year :)
8 comments:
Good Subash...
Everyone have their own views & it's upto their wish to accept suggestions or not!.. Apart from business activities, no one should be a dictator in others life, it ruins out relation...things go even worse on poking nose more on personal matters!!!... In simple, I advice like, help when one demands for :-)
Good post Subash,.
Wel said, we donot have any rights to dictate terms to anybody.
However, when it comes to close friends, there is nothing wrong in doing this. otherwise there will be no difference between mere aquaintances and friends. With friends... u can still poke half of your nose into their personal matters :) Full nose is only not permitted
Cheers
Dheepa
@Sunil ::
Thx. U r right Singampuli.
But some times we can predict the result for some actions of our friends, at that time Im planning to give suggestion not advice. The difference is suggestion is more like a choice left over to the person, alternatively advice is some thing we expect an action. I will be doing this to help friends who doesnt know the implications for what they are doing. Im not going to wait till they demand especially in friends case, for rest i will sit&wait till they demand - as u said.
@Deepa ::
Thx deeps. Dictation always result in more and more friction, that too if we cannot dictate our-self we should not do it to others. Also, ur viewd on dealing with frnds taken.
ps: dont talk about my nose - its already big enough to poke :)
Hi Subash
'Expectation is the mother of disappointments'. I like that sentence.
I wish this new year resolution works for to keep you rejoice, unlike the previous ones.
A note from an impressive lecture:
There are two ways of doing things.
1. Easy - short (day sleep, smoking)
2. Difficult - Disciplined (Getting up early, avoiding anger etc)
Naturally we tend to chose no 1 and end up in messing. I hope now you try to be 2 which is a good start.
Always try to choose the difficult ones that are meant for than the easiest route. It may look like foolish. But it works!!
Hereafter your brain will be conscious of doing so because you already know its difficult. Hence your expectations are set at lower before you begin.
Even if you fail, it wont reduce the joy rather gives you a lesson learned out of it.
After all we want to live happy. Isn't it?
Good one dude ..
Although i dont expect anything from others , but am getting hurt many a times because of my loved ones expectations ..I can control my emotions , but how can i control others emotions ...
@Krish :: Hope i wont spoil this year resolution.
After all we want to live happy. Isn't it? Absolutely YES man... I like ur attitude.
@krishnachaitanya ::
Although i dont expect anything from others
Simple man, Dont expect them to give up their emotions :)
resolution doesnt need new year!
is resolution really needed?
live happy.
Very good resolution... Most of the time the advice will be taken not based the truth behind it but based on who is giving it and how much the listener gives importance to you. You may have a wrong perception on that. One thing is when people grows their ego is also growing :)
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